USMC Rules for Combat

1. Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns.
2. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
3. Only hits count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss.
4. If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough nor using cover correctly.
5. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movement are preferred.)
6. If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a long gun and a friend with a long gun.
7. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember no one lived.
8. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, reloading, and running.
9. Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the gun,
9.5 Use a gun that works EVERY TIME. "All skill is in vain when an Angel pisses in the flintlock of your Musket."
10. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. Have a plan.
13. Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.
14. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
15. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
16. Don't drop your guard.
17. Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees.
18. Watch their hands. Hands kill. (In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them).
19. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.
20. The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.
21. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
22. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
23. Your number one Option for Personal Security is a lifelong commitment to avoidance, deterrence, and de-escalation.
24. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with a "4."

Navy Rules for Combat

1. Go to Sea
2. Send the Marines
3. Drink Coffee

Marines are about the most peculiar breed of human beings I have ever witnessed. They treat their service as if it was some kind of cult, plastering their emblem on almost everything they own, making themselves up to look like insane fanatics with haircuts to ungentlemanly lengths, worshipping their Commandant almost as if he was a god, and making weird animal noises like a band of savages. They’ll fight like rabid dogs at the drop of a hat just for the sake of a little action, and are the cockiest SOB’s I have ever known. Most have the foulest mouths and drink well beyond man’s normal limits, but their high spirits and sense of brotherhood set them apart and , generally speaking, of the United States Marines I’ve come in contact with, are the most professional soldiers and the finest men I have had the pleasure to meet.

- An Anonymous Canadian Citizen

Marine Corps

I was that which others did not want to be. I went where others feared to go, and did what others failed to do. I asked nothing from those who gave nothing, and reluctantly accepted the thought of eternal loneliness.....should I fail. I have seen the face of terror, felt the stinging cold of fear, and enjoyed the sweet taste of a moments love. I have cried, pained and hoped....but most of all, I have lived the times others would say were best forgotten. At least someday I will be able to say that I am proud of what I am.....A Marine...

-Author Unknown

The United States Marine Corps: Over 229 years of romping, stomping, hell, death and destruction. The finest fighting force the world has ever seen. We were born in a bomb crater, my mother was an M-16, my father the Devil. Each moment that I live is an additional threat upon your life.

I'm a roughish looking, roving sailor of the sea. I am cocky, self-centered, overbearing and I do not know the meaning of fear, for I am fear itself. I am a green amphibious monster made of blood and guts who arose from the sea, who's sole purpose in life is to perpetuate death and destruction upon the festering of Anti-Americans through-out the globe, whenever it may arise. And when my time comes, I'll die a glorious death on the battlefield giving my life to mom, apple pie and the American Flag.

We stole the Eagle from the Air Force, the Anchor from the Navy, and the Rope from the Army, and on the seventh day while God rested, we overran his perimeter and stole the globe and we've been running the show ever since.

-author Unknown

In the Beginning was the word and the word was God...

In the beginning was God... All was darkness, void and without form. So God created the heavens and the earth. He created the sun and the moon, as well as the stars so that light may pierce the darkness. An the earth God divided between the sea, the air and the land. Each he filled with assorted creatures.

In the Murky depths of the oceans God created salty, slimy squids. God called these creatures Sailors. These He dressed accordingly.

To soar into the air God created some flighty creatures which He called Airmen. These He dressed in uniforms all ruffled and foul.

And to walk the earth God created the lower creatures of the land which He called Soldiers. Then with a twinkle in his eye and with a sense of humor that only He could have, He dressed them (something He's had to do ever since). He gave them trousers too short, covers too large and pockets in which to warm their hands. To adorn these uniforms, God gave them badges, cords, ribbons, patches, stars, bells, whistles, emblems and dangling devices too! When your God you tend to get carried away in a big way (but who's gonna argue with you anyway right?).

Then, on the Seventh Day, He rested.

But on the Eighth Day at 0530 as the sun rose upon the earth, God looked down and was not happy.... I repeat NOT happy.

So thinking back over His infinite wisdom, and His labors, God created a heavenly creature which He called MARINE. These Marines, who were made in His image, were to be in the Air, Land and Sea. So to prepare them, He blessed them with many practical uniforms. He gave them practical fighting uniforms so they could wage war against the evils of communism and fascism. He gave them service uniforms for their daily work and training so that they might be sharp and ready. To top it off, he gave them Evening and Dress uniforms. Sharp and stylish, handsome things so they might profile with the ladies on Saturday night and impress the hell out of everyone. With their white gloves, white covers and shiny swords which could also be used to kill anyone who was not impressed.

And at the end of the eighth day, God looked over his work and was pissed. Yep, He was PO'd. In all His work there was but one flaw. He, the Almighty God, did not have a Marine Uniform. The more He thought about it, the madder He got. The madder He got, the sadder He got. So sad that he started to cry. He cried for forty days and forty nights. Finally He started thinking and realized that not everyone could be a Marine - So He'd just have to be content being God.

-Author Unknown